In my counseling office, when a bereaved person came to talk, I would ask to hear about their loved one. The answers came in many forms – “Well, he wasn’t perfect, that’s for sure, but he was perfect for me.” “She was what you’d call a stickler – she wouldn’t sit down at night until things were perfect in the house, and that went for me, too. She had many suggestions for me. I can’t believe how much I miss them.” “He was the best person I’ve ever known, a real stand-up guy, everybody loved him and looked up to him.” If I heard the latter, I’d say something like, “I bet he had some foibles, some things that drove you nuts. Can you tell me one or two of those?” If the answer was, “No, there wa
Blog: Riding the Waves of Grief
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