Blog: Riding the Waves of Grief

On grief, resilience, and healing

June 15, 2018

Father’s Day does not mean the same thing to everyone. The first time I ever paid attention to it was in 4th grade. Before that, lacking a father, I overlooked it. That year however, suddenly there was an art project that everyone had to do. (Note to younger readers: t...

June 6, 2018

Little-known fact: The Five Stages of grief are the source of almost-fifty years worth of conventional wisdom about grief. But they were meant to describe the end-of-life experience of people with life-threatening illness, not the experience of mourners who have lost a...

May 22, 2018

At first, we think our loved one who has died is gone from us forever. His absence seems all that is left behind, and it occupies all the space around us. Because we can no longer touch him or hear his voice, we fear that his influence on us and on the world is gone.


May 13, 2018

Your mother probably wants to hear from you – even if she lives next door, even if she lives half a world away, even if you haven’t spoken in decades. She probably wants to hear from you – you know the particulars better than I do. In any case, it’s an interesting and...

April 10, 2018

When we lose someone we love, we are left with their legacy to inspire and guide us. We begin to think about our own. How do we want to be remembered? One powerful old idea has recently been revived, and can help each of us share who we are.

Ever heard of an Ethical Wil...

March 13, 2018

Nancy (not her real name of course) came to see me at my counseling office almost a year after her father died. It was expected, as he’d had a cancer diagnosis for some time, but sudden at the same time, because he had been tolerating his chemotherapy well, but over th...

February 26, 2018

Grief is all around, once we have a reason to start looking for it. Usually, that reason is a loss of our own, when we seek to know that we are not alone. For me, it is also my preoccupation with learning all I can about the various forms of loss and the various ways w...

December 22, 2017

Recently, I shared here two pieces of wisdom to aid grieving: a guided meditation from Belleruth Naparstek and a practical TED-X talk by Amy Biancolli about surviving a loved one’s suicide. As I wrote, I made one of those beautiful mistakes that deepen and enrich the m...

December 9, 2017

After a suicide, Amy Biancolli tells us, “Grief is a monster.” Having lived through the suicide of a loved one, twice, she knows. A writer, she is able to describe in plain terms  the experience of losing first a sister, and then fifteen years later, her husband, to su...

November 28, 2017

Of all that we need when we are grieving, among the most immediate and rewarding is to find calm in the turbulent waters of grief. It seems an unlikely achievement, as many of us know grieving to be a deeply disorienting and stubborn force. As usual, what we need often...

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© 2017 by Carolyn B. Healy. All rights reserved.